EPI * Exocrine Pancreatic Insufficiency

Hi Everyone & thanks for all your support, special greetings which we love (and thank you)  and general support  interest.  So sorry I had not had the time to get in touch with everyone personally but things are difficult at home at the moment. 

Wallace weighed in on Saturday 24th July and now weighs an impressive 46.1 pounds  (total gain of 3.8 pounds) off the antibiotics.  I am so happy but life has been full of ups and downs.  I would say 2 out of three poos are solid and pick upable, the rest difficult to remove!.  Our vet is well impressed and said not to worry too much as he is gaining good weight.   Will post new pic on site sometime this week as Wallace is really starting to fill out. 

On the downside, my husband is not at all supportive and at times the burden is too much which is causing huge arguments within the family.  One minute he loves his wee boy, the next he wants rid of him - to the extent he got in touch with our local dog rehousing centre, who said they would accept him but would put him down.  Similarly my husband went off the deep end and contacted the breeders who also accepted their responsibility but offered to take him off our hands said they too would  put him down as they could not pass this burden onto anyone else.

I dont know where else to turn.  Wallace is doing so well.  I dont want to go into depth  (could really spit some blood) about our problems but Wallace is a loving dog with a great temperment (great with my kids aged 3 and 7 who love him to bits) and in my mind deserves a chance.  We are insured so finacially althought his food costs a wee bit more it is minimal. Can anyone offer some advice how to handle this?

Love Fiona, Wallace (Mhairi & Murron) x 

Fiona,

I hear your pain...My hubby was the same way...He thought there was no hope, then he accused me of not having Tara's best interest in mind...This is HARD!!! I KNOW!!!  What you need to do is to attempt to interest him in what you are researching, learning, etc...If he has no interest (like mine didn't), then you need to tell him you're in charge of Wallace's care!!!

I had one of those stubborn men and he pretty much turned around when Tara started getting better...

Good luck and feel free to vent here....We're here for you!!!

Thanks Donna

At the moment I dont know where to turn.  Wallace is doing well but Colin feels he is a burden!  Really appreciate your suport.  Tara is looking good. 

Thanks again

Fiona & Wallace

Fiona,

Tara celebrated her 6th birthday last year! And she has a double chin!

Oh Fiona - first off, glad to hear Wallace is responding and doing well.  Ugh on the hubby side though.   I personally never had that problem because my husband loves Jackie as much as I do.   Maybe, as he sees Wallace doing better and better he will realize that EPI is totally manageable and, like it did for me, it will get easier and easier.    There is no reason to put this dog down - hopefully what this site will do is bring some insight that he is totally treatable.   it is a lot to do and comprehend at first,  and I can tell you love Wallace, so hang in there and be the voice for Wallace and hopefully your husband will come around (all fingers and paws crossed).    This is so rough when one family member is willing to go the extra mile and the other doesn't understand, whether it be for financial reasons or just for the burden of it, or for whatever reason it may be.  Wallace is part of your family and he needs all of you and I hope you hubby realizes how important Wallace is to your family structure.   Hang in there and post away...we are here for you lady...

So sorry Fiona.  I can give lots of support but only very bad advice. I would just say "Rehome the husband"!!   I hope things get easier for you...hard enough to manage an unwell dog when you dont have good support for that.  Our thoughts are with you....

Don't play to your husband all the reasons you think you should keep Wallace and how much Wallace means to you.  Instead, play to the reasons your husband would want to keep Wallace if he was a healthy dog and then reassure him that Wallace is well on his way to being that exact dog that he wants.  Looks like you are going to need to take full responsibility for Wallace's care for the meantime as well.  Your husband is at his witts end so it isn't time to push him into helping and showing him it isn't that bad.  It's time to show him it can't be that bad if you can do it by yourself.

These are all obviously just suggestions and opinions but hopefully you can take something from them that helps.

Troy & Jade

Glad to hear that Wallace is doing better. Hopefully your husband will come around once he sees the improvement. We had our days when we really wondered if we were acting in Ulric's best interest, and at first my husband questioned the sanity and cost of keeping Ulric. It did take time but now the hubby is just as hooked on Ulric as I am. Hang in there. 

Oh dear Fiona - I understand exactly where you are coming from and feel free if you wish to PM and vent your worries to me - I will quite understand...

Some fellas (not all guys don't shoot me down in flames) just see £ or $ signs when they see a sick dog and after all a dog is just a dog isn't it :/........and that can come out in anger and frustration and an inability or unwillingness to cope.  Now I don't know your situation and you have alluded to other problems so this to him just maybe the excuse to vent anger but maybe it would help to gently explain that Wallce is part of the family and you wouldn't rehome a child because he or she developed Crohns Disease for example.  Perhaps you can agree an action plan with a definitive agreement on what might happen if Wallace does not respond or the bills get out of hand - sometimes husbands need to feel they have control of the situation (maybe he feel he has let down the family somehow or even been let down) so it may help.

As everyone said above though, and although I am new here, it would seem you have a great support network on here.

Best wishes

Fiona,

You are doing a wonderful job. Keep up the good work. 

Sometimes, when people don't see results in a timely manner,  or what they think is a timely manner, they (or we--as it can happen to any of us)  begin to think that if things are going to end badly anyway, then "let's get it over with," face the pain now, and move on.  And sometimes people just get tired and negative. 

I think Troy gave you a really good perspective in saying that you may have to take total responsibility for Wallace's care.  When you accept that totally without negativity,  this may give your husband the space he needs to work it out.  As Troy also said, your husband may see that Wallace "is the exact dog that he wants."  Just a few days ago a friend of ours who has had problems with his dog (non EPI) and has been having difficulty accepting them, said "It takes the fun out of it, doesn't it?  This is not the way I saw what having this dog would be like." 

This is where our difficulties lie--not accepting what is--and therefore missing the good of what is.

You cannot control your husband's responses to the situation.  But you can manage your own.  Stay peaceful.  Wallace is doing well.  Enjoy that.  Enjoy him, every moment.  Allow your husband the space to work it out.

Remember the famous quote that I have to remind myself of every day,  " I am never upset for the reason I think."

Barb

HI Fiona ~

Wallace sounds like such a wonderful soul and YEAH on the weight gain!!!! He is definitely responding well to tratment.

.. 

But I am so sorry to hear that Wallace's EPI is causing strife with you and your hubby.... but do agree with everyone here......if  you take responsibility of Wallace's care..maybe hubby won't feel so stressed about the situation.  My hubby also gave me a hard time at the beginning... what i had to do was focus on how much my gal was improving.....and as time went on and she responded to treatment (as it sounds like Wallace is doing ) our expense dropped.. I no longer had to fee izzy as much once she gained back her weight... she really REALLY improved like most EPI dogs do. As a matter of fact... many of these dogs do so well that in time we have to put them on diets....

It was just hard fior my hubby to accept at the beginning... at first EPI can be very daunting... but then. once the dog starts to improve....and the treatment becomes 2nd nature... sometimes we now forget that our dog even has a "condition".

Hi Fiona.  Been there also.  Yes, in the beginning, men see it differently for some reason.  As Olesia knows, after my husband and I met up w/ her once, Don was for putting him down.  The expense, no improvement, the time, etc.  I didn't want to go anywhere for long as I was afraid of the messes, etc.  But in time, he did learn that it is treatable, he learned how to feed, medicate, etc.  He loves Hondo now as much as I do.  He felt thre was no hope for Hondo back then, as did most people.  I didn't give up.  The husband can change.  Hang in there.  We had our share  of fights over this, I once told him when he got sick, I didn't want to put him (Don) down, why should I do it to Hondo.  It's not his fault.  I also once showed him where the door was.  Yes, it can get bad, but it does get better.

Glad Wallace is doing better.

Hello and Welcome to our Group!  As you have already seen, it is an incredible group of very knowledgeable and supportive people.  I am so glad to hear Wallace is doing better....and sorry husband is having a hard time with this.  Everyone reacts differently when there is someone sick in the family and some do not deal well at all with it.  It appears for many of us, one in the family, takes the primary responsibility for not only the actual care, but all the reading we do on the forum and elsewhere to understand the disease.  I think when one finds this forum you see the hope and good outcomes there can be...and if the other doesn't see this it can feel less hopeful and a burden.  The other possibility could be with two young children and a sick dog in the family that your husband feels he is not getting the attention he needs/wants.  He just needs to know that the focus on Wallace is temporary because as he improves he needs no more attention than a healthy dog (or not much more)...and he may also think he will not be able to do the training and play with Wallace that he had hoped for (if he had).  But as Wallace improves the training and play will be there.  I am not sure which way things are set up in your home: if you both are caring for Wallace or if it is just your or he is handling it.  Without knowing you or your situation you might want to consider doing the opposite of what you are doing:  if it is just one of you, if you both handle the care it could lessen the burden for him if he is doing the care.....or if just you are doing it he then might feel more involved.  If you are both doing it now, if you take full responsibility, he might feel it is less of a burden if he doesn't have to be involved.  Feel free to vent here as everyone understands.  It is so overwhelming in the beginning but for most of us it does improve and get easier and less time-consuming.  And another thought: some of us paid a substantial amount to a breeder and end up with a sick dog...one who we love and wouldn't give back (even though via contract it is an option) and there is some definite disappointment and anger to deal with.  I know it is easier said than done, but hang in there. 

Hi Fiona, it's a shame you are having to go through this with the additional burden of an under-understanding husband but judging from the experiences related here it seems not uncommon. I find this quite amazing. I am also gobbsmacked by the level of generous and understanding responses from their female partners as I, being a bloke, am probably not quite that nice. I confess I had to delete my first draft to your post as it may gone against the spirit if not the rules of the forum because I do find it odd that so many men's first response seems to be to get rid the 'problem' by euthanasing the animal. Financial hardship notwithstanding for me there is a real and marked difference between taking the courageous decision of euthanasia for the animal's welfare and the convenient one simply because it now seems to be a burden. Doing what you have chosen to do takes real courage and I applaude you for it.

Advice? well, perhaps your husband should have a think about the name he chose for your dog. Sir William Wallace was brave and courageous in the face of overwhelming odds and had he not stood up to King Edward I then Scotland might well be just another English county today (no offence to all you wonderful English folk out there!). Perhaps a bit of the same courage and 'intestinal fortitude' is needed here.

Good luck, stick at it,

Craig

Craig ~  VERY well said

Fiona ~ Jsut wondering about you and Wallace and hoping that hubby is coming around???

Fiona, I totally understand the issue that is going on here. But mine was my father. I'm only 20 years old, and trying to convience a 55 year old man that THERE IS HOPE, is absolutely impossible! Especially when he is super stubborn & set on his way. YUP, it's his way or the highway.

I really think that perhaps you could show your husband this website, and the success stories that are here. Bella was diagnosed in May and her weigh gain has been so significant. We haven't seen the vet, but will anything this August. People that come over are astounded by Bella's weight gain. My boyfriends parents came over the other day and saw her for the first time since the diagnosis. They couldn't stop saying how wonderful she looks now, and how HEALTHY she looks. It is possible to have success with EPI. Yes, it can be very costly..but I really think that it is SO worth it. As everyone else here does, hence the reason they haven't given up on their pups.

I am wondering how you are making out with good ole' Wallace. I hope the babe is doing good, as you and your family.

Thinking of you, and wishing you the best

Jessica - just have to say you and Bella are a perfect tribute to how once you get EPI under control the turnaround can be amazing!!   Loved reading this and I pray down the road we read the same from Fiona...  :-)

Fiona - I have no words of wisdom here. Just sort out everything said and take what you think will work.

Michele - I hope the same as you, well put

Jessica - how did you get to be such a smart cookie and you're only 20 yrs old. Gosh, I'm....never mind.

Mmmmm... you could try to GENTLY stress how much Wallace means to the kids and how they would be deeply hurt if they lost him.

I don't really know your circumstances so its hard to advise.

Maybe, hubby is afraid you will put so much into the care and may lose Wallace and that would hurt you badly?

Maybe, the thought of 'for life' treatment is playing on his mind?

The truth is you have Wallace insured so much comes back... that is good!

At first it all seems to take over the whole of life but after a while it becomes nothing more that a normal dog who is fed a bit differently... and I DO mean normal!

Razzy is nearing four years EPI and its just as though she is like any other dog... her age has brought a dicky hip but that is just AGE and the fact she is big and has dashed around like a maniac putting strain on those joints. It would have happened even WITHOUT EPI!

The cost too is not very much different to a normal dog... I spend quite a lot on making our own raw diet but that is because it suits her and she LIKES it and I would have done it anyway.

What I'm trying to say is that EPI is easier once it's under control.

I know of several dogs who were working SAR dogs and they went back to work when stable... I know of agility dogs who went back to work... ONE became an international champion agility dog once stable.

Wallace is the SAME dog he was before EPI and will be the same dog when stable... if hubby can be made to see that maybe he will feel better about the condition.

Val

HI Fiona,

I too am wondering how you are doing...You've been in my prayers every night...

My hubby too lOVES Tara to death, but the stress it was putting on us was incredible...I now refer to it as the "dark days".  Tara wouldn't eat, which was bad and kept dropping weight...I couldn't feed three meals a day by myself as I was stressing so badly by the time I came to meal three that if she didn't eat it, I'd break down crying, which wasn't acomplishing anything good... Are you having issues getting Wallace to eat? I finally employed my mother to help me and it all worked out...

Thinking of you!